Ok

Ok I've been trying to think of something to write about for awhile now and I have been feeling this way for awhile but didn't really want to put it out there. Now I want to.

I love our church. I love the people there, they are so nice. The sermons are usually just what I need to hear. But no matter how much I love it, I can't get past the fact that I no longer feel like I fit in there. A few years ago, I was single, all my friends were single and we got together all the time. I know marriage changes your friendships but is it supposed to change it so much that you feel lonely? Now I wouldn't change being married-it really is the best this that ever happened to me. I love my husband and he is my best friend but he can't replace my girlfriends. I miss my girl time......the couples at our church that are around our age and married are either parents or live to far away. I used to have a core group of friends and now we are in such different stages of life that it is hard to find time to get together and if we do, it is weird.  Not that they don't still care for me because I know they do but it isn't the same. I need some friends.

Hubby and I joined a Bible study and I was excited because there were a lot of couples in it. However I still felt like I didn't fit in there....I never felt like I had enough to contribute to the discussion. I don't even get to see my husband that much. I hate that he has to work 2 jobs just to help make ends meet. I want a better life for us but at what cost? At the cost of not seeing my husband? I'm tired of this.

Sunday Sunday!!!

Well, It's been awhile since I updated but each time I come on to update, I sit here and stare at the blank screen because my like is just not that interesting.....well to me anyway......

I love having the weekends off of work. It is amazing. I have time to do the things I need to do and time to just chill if I need it. Last weekend was my BIL's wedding. They had a nice outdoor ceremony and was it hot! I also grabbed shoes on my way out the door and didn't bother trying them on.....well, those shoes don't fit anymore. I wore them for our wedding and didn't really have problems with them but now I am 40 lbs heavier than I was. I miss being that size. I am trying so hard to get back into the groove of being healthy. Each and every time I am doing well, something happens that makes me binge on food. Half the time I eat I am not even hungry and I KNOW that I'm NOT hungry......just because it is there I feel I have to eat it. I am so tired of my clothes not fitting right and feeling fat every day. Looking at pictures from this past weekend made me realize how out of control my eating habits are.

My mom and I are doing a challenge, we are walking 5 miles a week and no sugary snacks/food. I am also going to add french fries to mine. French fries hold no nutritional value and I am seriously addicted to them. If I go to a place that serves them, I want them. There are days where I just want a thing of fries. Really? There are so many more healthy options than french fries. What if I wanted a banana? Or an Apple? or carrots? I mean really? How many things of fries do I have to eat before I realize and care that they are making me fat?!?! hmmm, I should just do a post on french fries.....maybe I will.

Something exciting happened in the last couple of weeks. A friend and I have been kind of at odds for over a year. Mostly it was my fault for being a stubborn evil person. Well, we are working on our friendship again and I can't wait to see where God takes it.

Jeremy got me a Kindle the other day!! I love it! It's so much nicer and lighter than a book. I downloaded a bible on it and used it in church today. It was awesome.

Well I think that is about all I have for now.....hopefully I will update again soon!